Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Rumble strips road head = magical
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
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