3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
