Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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