Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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