In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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