i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm just crazy horny about you
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
