my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
this is an emotional support booty call
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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