The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Randomize
