just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
