So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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