maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
dude. I can hear the air.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize