everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
