do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
