I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
