I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
