would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
