I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Use "feeling words"
Yay
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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