Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
