I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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