Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
