Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
