don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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