Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
