Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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