Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Randomize
