Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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