I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize