His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
babies were throwing up all over the place
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Randomize
