Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize