I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
