i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
