Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize