you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
