I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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