Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
