what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I think people are normalizing furries
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
