So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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