its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
