Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Your topless pictures make me question reality
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
