I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
