i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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