This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
