Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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