it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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