i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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