I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
My dick has a subreddit
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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