therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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