the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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