He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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