he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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