If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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